Zamo's Friends and Foes: Hoppy
This is Hoppy. He's retarded, er - a little bit challenged, like most frogs and amphibians. I use him for studying human psychology as I find monkey humans and frogs have similarly deficient and interesting thought processes. Except for the fact that Hoppy knows he's an idiot needing to work on his scholastic abilities and he wants to evolve to something higher than a frog by getting a better education so he gladly goes along with my plans. Humans refuse to face up to this as they don't know any better.
Bizarre side note: I had heard there was a whole country full of frogs and I planned to repatriate Hoppy there, but then I found out it's France and for some reason there aren't many frogs there at all, it's just something people call the French people. Which is weird because I met some French people and they weren't slimy and green at all, nor did they have webbed feet. They did share Hoppy's obsession with soccer, however. But that seems to me a rather flimsy reason to confuse the two. Silly humans, can't tell the difference.
All things considered, though, Hoppy is useful to use for my dirty work, and maybe even to have around as a friend. Well, sort of.